Dogs are man’s bestfriend, since time immemorial. If you have a dog, then you would understand why people adore their dogs. this page contains funny and cute dog quotes that you can share to other people who loves their dog very much.


Funny Dog Quotes

“If a dog will not come to you after having looked you in the face, you should go home and examine your conscience.” – Woodrow Wilson

 “It is fatal to let any dog know that he is funny, for he immediately loses his head and starts hamming it up.” – P.G. Wodehouse

 “Owners of dogs will have noticed that, if you provide them with food and water and shelter and affection, they will think you are god. Whereas owners of cats are compelled to realize that, if you provide them with food and water and shelter and affection, they draw the conclusion that they are gods.” – Christopher Hitchens

“You think dogs will not be in heaven? I tell you, they will be there long before any of us.” – Robert Louis Stevenson

“I’ve seen a look in dogs’ eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that basically dogs think humans are nuts.” – John Steinbeck

 “To err is human, to forgive, canine.” – Unknown

“What counts is not necessarily the size of the dog in the fight; it’s the size of the fight in the dog.” – Dwight D. Eisenhower

“Dogs are getting bigger, according to a leading dog manufacturer.” – Leo Rosten

“Better not take a dog on the space shuttle, because if he sticks his head out when you’re coming home his face might burn up.” – by Jack Handy

“I took my dog for a walk… all the way from New York to Florida… I said to him “There now you’re done.” – Steven Wright

“Whoever said you can’t buy happiness forgot little puppies.” – Gene Hill

“A dog is not ‘almost human’ and I know of no greater insult to the canine race than to describe it as such.” – John Holmes.


Cute Dog Quotes

“Every boy should have a dog. It teaches him to turn around three times before lying down.” – Robert Benchley

“Dogs are our link to paradise. They don’t know evil or jealousy or discontent. To sit with a dog on a hillside on a glorious afternoon is to be back in Eden, where doing nothing was not boring-it was peace.”

― Milan Kundera


“In order to really enjoy a dog, one doesn’t merely try to train him to be semihuman. The point of it is to open oneself to the possibility of becoming partly a dog.”-Edward Hoagland

“Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear.”- Dave Barry

“If you eliminate smoking and gambling, you will be amazed to find that almost all an Englishman’s pleasures can be, and mostly are, shared by his dog.”– George Bernard Shaw


“Money will buy you a pretty good dog, but it won’t buy the wag of it’s tail.” – Henry Wheeler Shaw

“If a picture wasn’t going very well I’d put a puppy dog in it, always a mongrel, you know, never one of the full bred puppies. And then I’d put a bandage on its foot… I liked it when I did it, but now I’m sick of it.” – Norman Rockwell

“By what right has the dog come to be regarded as a “noble” animal? The more brutal and cruel and unjust you are to him the more your fawning and adoring slave he becomes; whereas, if you shamefully misuse a cat once she will always maintain a dignified reserve toward you afterward- you will never get her full confidence again.” – Mark Twain

“Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that is how dogs spend their lives.” – Sue Murphy


“I named my dog ‘Stay’… so I can say ‘Come here, Stay. Come here, Stay.'” – Steven Wright

“Do not make the mistake of treating your dogs like humans or they will treat you like dogs.”– Martha Scott


“The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven, not man’s.” – Mark Twain

“Money will buy you a pretty good dog, but it won’t buy the wag of his tail.” – Henry Wheeler Shaw

“The dog was created specially for children. He is the god of frolic.” – Henry Ward Beecher

“No man can be condemned for owning a dog. As long as he has a dog, he has a friend; and the poorer he gets, the better friend he has.” – Will Rogers

“Who loves me will love my dog also.’ – St. Bernard

“Every dog must have his day.” – Jonathan Swift

“I spilled spot remover on my dog. He’s gone now.” – Steven Wright

“I put contact lenses in my dog’s eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles.” – Steven Wright

“Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear.” – Dave Barry

“Dogs are not people dressed up in fur coats, and to deny them their nature is to do them great harm.” – Jeanne Schinto

“A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.”– Josh Billings


“Tell me, if you can, of anything that’s finer than an evening in camp with a rare old friend and a dog after one’s hear.” – Nash Buckingham

“The great pleasure of a dog is that you may make a fool out of yourself with him, and not only will he not scold you, but he will make a fool out of himself too.”– Samuel Butler


“It is hard to teach an old dog tricks.”- William Camden

“It is naught good a sleepying hound to wake.” – Chaucer

“The nose of the Bulldog has been slanted backwards so that he can breathe without letting go.” – Winston Churchill

“Who kicks a dog kicks his own soul towards hell.” – Will Judy

“A dog is a liberal… He wants to please everybody.” – William Kunstler

“Don’t accept your dog’s admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.”- Ann Landers

“When thieves come, I bark; when gallants, I am still – So perform both my master’s and mistress’s will.” – Samuel Taylor Coleridge

“’Twould make a dog laugh.” – J.P. Collier


“It’s a puppy… it’s kind of like Prozac.” – Dr. Fun Archive

“Folk will know how large your soul is, by the way you treat a dog!” – Charles F. Dornan

“What counts is not necessarily the size of the dog in the fight – it’s the size of the fight in the dog.” – Dwight D. Eisenhower

“We are shaped and fashioned by what we love.” – Goethe

“Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to.” – Joe Gores

“We never really own a dog as much as he owns us.” – Gene Hill

“The fidelity of a dog is a precious gift.”– Konrad Lorenz


“There is no faith which has never yet been broken, except that of a truly faithful dog.”- Konrad Lorenz

“Just give me a comfortable couch, a dog, a good book, and a woman. Then if you can get the dog to go somewhere and read the book, I might have a little fun!”- Groucho Marx

“Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read.” – Groucho Marx

“No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as a dog does.” – Christopher Morley

“The dog has got more fun out of Man than Man has got out of the dog, for the clearly demonstrable reason that Man is the more laughable of the two animals.” – James Thurber

“If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons.” – James Thurber

“He cannot be a gentleman which loveth not a dog.” – John Northbrooke

“To a man, the greatest blessing is individual liberty. To a dog, it is the last word in despair.” – Wm. Lyon Phillips (1865-1943)

“The dog that trots about finds a bone.” – Proverb

“God sat down for a moment when the dog was finished in order to watch it… and to know that it was good, that nothing was lacking, that it could not have been made better.” – Rainer Marie Rilke

“Recollect that the Almighty, who gave the dog to be companion of our pleasures and our toils, hath invested him with a nature noble and incapable of deceit.” – Sir Walter Scott

“Blessed is the person who has earned the love of an old dog.”– Sidney Jeanne Seward


“Just because man no longer understands his place in the universe don’t let him assume all God’s creatures have become equally confused and trivial.” – Bill Tarrant

“Children and dogs are as necessary to the welfare of the country as Wall Street and the railroads.” – Harry S. Truman

“If there are no dogs in Heaven, then I want to go where they went.” – unknown

“If you own a dog, you’d better have a sense of humor.” – unknown

“Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.” – Mark Twain

“If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man.”– Mark Twain


“Man is the only animal that blushes. Or needs to.” – Mark Twain

“Dogs will die, and men will weep over them as long as there are men and there are dogs.” – unknown

“If you’re dog thinks you’re the greatest… don’t seek a second opinion.” – unknown

“It’s impossible to keep a straight face in the presence of one or more puppies.” – unknown

“You can’t keep a good man down or an over affectionate dog.” – unknown

“Let dogs delight to bark, for God hath made them so.” – Isaac Watts

“There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face.” – Ben Williams

“My goal in life is to be as good of a person as my dog already believes me to be.”– unknown


“One reason a dog is such a lovable creature is his tail wags instead of his tongue.”- unknown

“The first dog is the dog who gives you so much that the first dog is often the reason for the second dog.” – unknown

“There is only one smartest dog in the world, and everybody has it.” – unknown

“Try to be as nice a person as your dog thinks you are.” – unknown


“Old dogs, like old shoes, are comfortable. They might be a bit out of shape and a little worn around the edges, but they fit us well.”– Bonnie Wilcox


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